Tuesday 27 December 2011

CROSS CULTURAL WEDDING

Hello everyone, hope the Christmas holiday has been fantastic. Mine has been pretty eventful with lots of places to go to and people to visit. I attended a traditional wedding here in Lagos yesterday and it was fun. The groom is from Anambra while the bride is from Akwa Ibom. When my father showed me the invitation card, I jokingly told him that it wouldn't be a bad idea to have my own traditional wedding (Igba-Nkwu) in Lagos. At least, it would save us the stress of travelling and all that. He said Mba,,,, that in our culture (Igbo), the traditional wedding must be done in the girls' village..............I just smiled because I already knew that would be his response. My father loves his tradition ehnnnnn. Chai. :-)

Anyway, back to the wedding i attended. I love the idea of cross cultural weddings. The fusion of both cultures adds color to the event. The wedding was held at the poolside of a hotel. At the entrance of the venue, we were welcomed by two ladies who beckoned on us to come and sign the couple's tree. Below is the picture:


They politely informed us that the couple requested that everyone should thumbprint and write their names on their paper tree. It was my first time of seeing that and it was amusing, but we obliged them. I guess the couple would later frame it. We were given baby wipes to clean the ink from our fingers and then ushered to our seats to enjoy the wedding rites and all. I loved watching the cultural troupe from Akwa Ibom as they entertained us. Below are some pictures I took of them:



I like their dance. The way they twirl around with that round thing on their waist and all was fun to watch. I also appreciated my Ndi Igbo people when they came out to do their traditional dance and usher the groom to his seat..:



The group had almost passed where I was sitting, before i remembered that I wanted to take pictures. :-).

It was an interesting wedding with parts of it done in the Akwa Ibom dialect and parts done in Igbo. I admire people that marry outside their tribe. Aside from the love the couple have for each other, I think it takes a whole lot of courage too, especially if you do not understand your spouse's language. Using myself as an example, even though i grew up in Lagos, I can't speak Yoruba. *covers face in shame*. I understand a bit of the language, but that's about it.  So imagine if I were to marry a Yoruba guy, I would feel kindda weird if we visit his people or friends and they are gisting in his language. Oh well, yeah, I know i could always learn it and all that.

My sister is married to an Edo man and i sometimes ask her how she feels when they are in the midst of the hubby's people and they are all gisting in his language. She just shrugged and said it's not that bad and she is also learning the language, but in the meantime, once they remember that she doesn't understand, they quickly switch back to English. :-). I think that's really nice of them ooo. :-)

I wish the couple: Emem and Okezie a fabulously blissful marriage.

16 comments:

  1. I agree with you, cross cultural weddings can be colorful. I love the idea of a couple's tree and signing it. I had a colleague, Yoruba, who married an ibo guy. Though she doesnt speak Ibo, she is so taken to her husband's traditions they can't but like her. *that's what I think sha* She goes for August meeting and also is in the women's group from her husband's village. I guess it isnt that bad if you love the person and your in-laws are not stressing

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  2. Love the idea of a tree.. and it looks beautiful already. yeah,Cross Cultural weddings can be colourful and interesting!

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  3. That's a really unique idea with the thumbprint tree that will be framed, love it.

    As an Igbo married to a Yoruba, it does get weird but if the relationship between the couple themselves and the rest of the family is OK, there will be no ill feelings.

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  4. I think your sister's family is nice, for them to switch to english.
    The idea of the tree is really nice. I will also like to do something different for my wedding

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  5. I am sooooo stealing the tree idea (if i remember that is), it's really beautiful and it's something you can look at years later or everday sef-if it's on your wall- and your special day and the people that shared it with you.

    My mum is all for cross-cultural marriages. Her own is "Do you love him? Does he treat you right? Is he God fearing? Tor shikena" lol so it excites me knowing that i won't have anything to worry about if i were to marry outside our tribe.

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  6. @ Okeoghene: I like the part of the in-laws not stressing. That your colleague is a smart woman.

    @ Tamie: The tree idea is nice. People are becoming creative with their wedding plans.

    @ Myne: Ooooooo, didn't know you are Igbo. And you are also cross culturally married (I just like the way the sentence sounds) :-D. That's cool.

    @ @ilola: Yeah, her in-laws are nice people. Different and unique is it now. I trust you to churn out some crazy nice ideas for your wedding. :-)

    @ Dosh: LOL, feel free to steal the idea dear. Your mom is a correct person oo. I had a neighbor (an Igbo lady) that was to get married
    to an Edo guy. On the day of her traditional wedding, her mum kept on crying. She still wasn't in full support of her only daughter marrying outside their tribe.

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  7. I always admire inter-cultural/racial couples...it is not easy. Not just the language, one has to be able to adjust to the culture also.

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  8. Hehehehehe! Eh, the proof of the pudding is in the eating. I didn't want to marry but I knew if I did that it would be to an Igbo man. I was a equal opportunities dater and I was down for whatever but when the time for egwuriegwu passed, I married onye be anyi from my backyard sef.

    But you're right. CC marriages are good when the couple are into each other no matter what...in fact, the ones I see working here in London are as a result of people that have differently backgrounds and cultures but are mostly British in their outlook. That is their common identity.

    Nice blog! Off to read more (where is my akara ball godu?)

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  9. @ Lara: The part of adjusting to a different culture is quite scary, but true. Thanks for stopping by dear.

    @ Igbomarriage: I really appreciate your following me back. Smart babe @ when the time for egwuriegwu passed, you settled for one from your backyard. LOL. Will ship some akara balls to you to usher in the new year. *hugggssss* dear.

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  10. Its not easy ooo! But I believe that love transcends all barriers. (well, I hope to marry a man who is from a different culture)
    I wish your friends a happy married life!

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  11. @ Ema Leecious: Yeah, I agree with you dear. Love does transcend every barrier. Thanks on their behalf.

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  12. Wow, The power of the internet... I must say, it took quite a while to investigate and find out whom this naija bank girl was after my wife called my attention to the fact that our wedding was on the internet and good things were said about it. It gave us great joy. Meanwhile the guest tree thing was her idea and i loved it. So people you can steal the idea all you want, she wont mind, at least its in the record you saw it at our wedding first.

    As per cross cultural relationships and every other, its only the two players that matter. I promise you, if the two players are into each other and truly love each other then every other person or thing is secondary.

    Che... Small but mighty, a phrase your father used to address someone in my presence... hihihihihihi.. I have been reading your blogs and i must say they are all wonderful and .. hint hint ... hope Sharon doesn't read your blogs.

    Thank you

    Okezie

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    Replies
    1. Now this is most definitely a pleasant surprise. What were the odds that Emem stumbled on this post. Niceeee. :-D..I'm glad you guys liked it. I agree with you that if the couple really love each other, they would have a blissful marriage regardless of the cultural differences. I appreciate your being a part of my blog world. My warm regards to Emem.

      P.S: Sharon doesn't know about the blog. Hehehehhee

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